10 Essential Products For Runners

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It’s been a few millennia since the only running gear you needed was a spear and a loincloth. Oh, and lots of hunger to motivate you to run something to death so you'd be known as “provider of meat” (aka the guy who gets all the chicks) to the tribe. There are many benefits to being a regular runner, including burning flab off your frame. You can use running to become a lean machine (aka the guy who gets all the chicks). I’ve been a dedicated runner for eight years now and had dozens of articles on the subject published in major newspapers such as the LA Times and Chicago Tribune. Some are critical of distance running, saying it’s going to turn you into a scrawny waif and that sprinting is the way to go to build a muscular physique. While it’s true that top-level marathoners don’t want excess muscle mass to slow them down, for the average guy, distance running, when coupled with weight training, is an excellent method of burning fat, being healthy and looking good. Running is what brought out my abs, and it didn’t take away all the muscle I’d gained through lifting, even though now I’m getting up to marathon distances. To be an effective runner, you need stuff, and not just shoes. Read on to learn how to invest wisely for this most awesome of sports. iPod ShuffleI call it the “exerciser’s iPod” because it’s small and simple. You can clip it to a hat, waist band, shirt sleeve or your nipple if that’s your thing. If you need to pause, play, skip past that ill-advised Yanni song or crank up The Prodigy for motivation to make it up a hill, it’s all done by feel so you won’t miss a step. For the beginner and intermediate runner, music is proven to be an excellent motivator. Buy the iPod Shuffle here.Road IDIf you’re some pansy living in some bubble because you’re afraid of getting hurt, then you won’t need this. Otherwise, it might be a good idea for people like paramedics and doctors to know who you are in case some cell-phone yapping SUV driver plows into you while you’re running. That way they can learn your drug allergies and blood type, and contact loved ones to inform them of your misfortune. Medics can also learn if you’re willing to donate your extra-healthy heart and lungs in case your brains get battered into a pulp and you’re breathing through a tube. Buy the Road ID here. Nike Men's Stretch Woven Track Running Shorts Dri-Fit SizeYou know how women have jogging bras? Think of these shorts like a bra for your nuts. The spandex-like inside liner keeps things tucked into a safe place where they don’t get bashed around and prevents chafing between the thighs as well. Buy the Nike shorts here.Garmin 4 Forerunner 210 Water ResistantTracking your runs is a great motivational tool. With this GPS watch, you can measure how far and how fast you are, and push yourself to get better. The water-resistant feature means you don’t have to worry about rain or Ron Jeremy-level sweat. Buy the watch here. Neutrogena Ultimate SportA dermatologist recommended this specific product to me, and I can verify that it’s awesome. It won’t run, isn’t greasy, smells good and allows you to do those sunny shirtless runs without fear of the cancer-inducing lobster fry. Buy the sunscreen here. FuelBeltIf you’re using that sunblock, then you’ll need water even more. And if you don’t like the idea of drinking out of a puddle, then the FuelBelt will come in handy. It also has room to stock food for the times that you unexpectedly “bonk” and get that sudden-onset-of-poo-like feeling. I’ve got some low back issues and don’t like the feel of waist packs, but I’ve found the fuel belt to be very comfortable; you hardly know it’s there.Buy the FuelBelt here, Runner’s hatIt’s not only for keeping the sun out of your eyes, but the sweat as well, as this hat has a great absorbent band across the forehead. You will need to wash this thing so it doesn’t end up smelling like a hockey bag. If you’re running regularly, I recommend having two hats so you don’t have to worry about having one that’s clean. As an added bonus, keeping sun off your face prevents premature aging. Buy the hat here.SunglassesUV radiation is as bad for your eyes as it is for your skin. Even with a hat you can get glare coming up off the pavement that makes the whole experience less enjoyable. Plus, you get to look like Neo from The Matrix while you’re running. Buy the sunglasses here.BodyglideHave you ever seen those marathon photos of the guy with the bleeding nipples? Dude forgot his Bodyglide. Smear this stuff around sensitive bits that can chafe. Seriously, I’m not just talking about nipples, armpits and below the ankles; for long distance, it’s time to drop your shorts and get busy. Lock the bathroom door while doing so to prevent embarrassing photos being taken and posted on the Internet.Buy Bodyglide here. Continue Reading

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