What It's Really Like To Be A Stay-At-Home Dad

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There was a time in my life when I leaned toward what was cool, cutting edge or in thezeitgeist. I worked in Hollywood, specifically in comedy. I was a TV development executivefor stars like AdamSandler and Chelsea Handler, aswell as a comic booker for a popular late-night talk show on CBS. I was movin’ andshakin’, hopping from network meetings into power dinners and ending my night with adouble Belvedere on the rocks in the back corner of a double show at the Hollywood Improv.Everyone thought that I had the coolest job, and so did I.

I’m not proudof it, but I think it started going to my head. I’d be having a conversation withone guy and see someone else walk in who had a little bit more going on, and I'd findmyself zoning out, nodding my head, saying stuff like, “Yeah, man, I totallyagree” or “Oh, really? That’s cool.” Just phoning it in.That was a little over three years ago, before I left the entertainment industry andbecame a full-time stay-at-home dad.

A few weeks ago I found myself at abarbecue that my wife (full-time reality-TV executive) had dragged me along to, talking tosome schmoe who asked what I did for a living. Here we go again, I thought.

“I’m a stay-at-home dad for two toddlers,” I said.

And justlike that, it came full circle on me. I could see the blank look on the dude’s faceas he began to stare off into the distance, watching as someone else walked into theparty. He gave me an “Oh, that’s cool, man.” I wanted to smash thestupid microbrew over his forehead, rip out his intestines and wrap them around his neck,but I couldn’t.

I’d be a hypocrite.

I tried to subtlyexplain to him that being a stay-at-home dad really was cool. I don’t havea boss (unless you count Ava trying to manipulate me) or a schedule, aside from dual naps,which are a must.

Think about how awesome it is to introduce these kids tosomething new every day, something they’ve never seen before, and just sit back andwatch the looks on their faces. Forget about closing the big deal -- I just taught atoddler to aim and pee on stuff with outstanding accuracy. I am their ambassador to theworld, which is a huge title increase from my last job.

I was sellin’,but I’m not sure if he was buyin’.

Back then, I think the reason Iwent blank on people was because I couldn’t connect with what they were talkingabout or because whatever they were pitching me just didn’t sound very promising.

I’m guessing the same thing happened to me at that barbecue.

Alot of guys can’t connect with the fact that I’m a SAHD. In most cases, theyinitially quiz me about why I’m not working, tell me “that sucks” andthat they’ll put me in touch with their buddy who’s a headhunter and get mesquared away by next week. Continue Reading

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