Bigorexia

[damage]

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i must suffer from it then too because i don't think he's that big.....he's smaller on his frame than i am on mine by the looks of the video

LOl I was thinking the same thing. He is a regular big guy, not huge or a monster....... Personally I think he could stand to get a little bigger .

I must have bigorexia.

[ChemicallyEngineered]

TweetThe thing with bigorexia is that you don't see the real you in the mirror, just like an anorexic person still sees the fat person in the mirror. I have gone from 136lbs at 5'10" to 207lbs and i still think i just look ok. I constantly compare myself to others in the gym who i think are close to my size. Yet i am constantly told iam bigger than them and in my head i know that i must be but i just can't see it. I guess another problem is it's not like you can stop everyone and be like "excuse me, can you stand shoulder to shoulder with me so i can see how we compare?"
There is a guy who trains in the morning at my gym and he is constantly asking my advice and complimenting me. I dont necessarily see myself as bigger per se, i see myself just as having a better overall package and looking more like a bodybuilder. But when he told me he only weighs 168lbs it hit me that i outweight him by 40lbs so i must be a lot bigger than him. Self image is a tricky thing to change, at least for me.

[ChemicallyEngineered]

TweetI also think it's relative to who is doing the comparing. If you compare yourself to the average middle aged person(i'm 36yrsold) then i'm sure most people would say they are better than the average person. But we aren't looking to the average american for a comparison, we look up to the pro's and they way i see it i'm a good 30-40lbs off of that mark and it seems so elusive. And while only a small percentage of people out there will get to that point of development, it is still the ideal proportions that i seek. For me anything less looks like a "fitness model" not a bodybuilder. I want it to be unmistakeable that i am a bodybuilder no matter what i wear. Evan Centopani was quote saying "Small guys wear underarmour shirts to try and show that they have muscle. When you are really big your muscles show no matter what you wear." That's kinda the same mindset I have. If your traps, delts, back and chest are busting out of a xxl t-shirt and it's still hanging loose at the waiste then you might be big. Well i guess that's enough insight into my sickness.....